Find out how you become a kinship carer, and what to expect from the process.
Private foster care
Information on private foster care, including who can be a private foster carer, how you become one, and support you can get.
This advice applies to: England and Wales
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What is private foster care?
Private foster care is when a child is looked after for 28 days or more by someone who knows or is connected with them but is not a close relative. This could be a great aunt or great uncle, a friend or neighbour, or a cousin.
You need to notify children’s services about a private foster care arrangement.
Who can be a private foster carer?
Private foster carers are often distant relatives or family friends. You cannot be a private foster carer if you are a close relative.
The Children Act 1989 defines a close relative as a grandparent, uncle or aunt, brother or sister, half-brother or half-sister by marriage or civil partnership.
You are only considered a private foster carer if the children are:
- under 16 (or up to 18 if the child is disabled)
- not in the care of children’s services
If the child is 16 or 17, and is not disabled, it is considered informal kinship care.
The child is not placed by children’s services in a private fostering arrangement.
How you become a private foster carer
The arrangement is made between you and the child’s parents.
Children’s services are not involved in making private foster arrangements, but they do need to be informed.
You do not need to be formally approved as a foster carer, but the social worker will check some things about the arrangement, including:
- if the carer or anyone living in the house has a relevant criminal record, this is called a Disclosure and Barring Service (DBS) check
- accommodation
- who else lives in the household
- arrangements for contact with the parents
- school
- health
You should ideally inform children’s services about the arrangement 6 weeks before the arrangement starts. You must legally tell them within 6 weeks of the child living with you.
If children’s services are involved in placing the child with you, or a social worker is saying that they are unable to return a child to their parents, this is not private fostering. You will need to be assessed, paid an allowance and supported as a kinship foster carer.
How long can it last?
Private foster care should last (or is intended to last) for more than 28 days. If it lasts less than 28 days, it’s considered an informal arrangement.
If you are asked to look after the child for less than 28 days but several times over a few months, contact your local children’s services to ask about their policy.
Private fostering arrangements can end whenever the parent decides. It doesn’t matter how long you have cared for the child: their parent can still resume care without giving you notice.
If you are unable or unwilling to continue looking after the child, it’s up to the parents to arrange alternative care, but you should also inform children’s services.
If you think the child should stay in your care
If you think there is a good reason why a child should stay in your care, you may want to apply for a child arrangements order or special guardianship order. This will formalise your arrangement, but you should always get legal advice before making any decisions.
Your responsibilities
You need to let children’s services know that you plan to become a private foster carer. But in many situations, this will happen in an emergency. Tell them as soon as possible if the arrangement has already started.
You’ll be asked to provide information about:
- the child
- their parents
- the planned duration of the arrangement
In England, children’s services should give you information about private fostering in their family and friends care policy. Find your local policy, as well as other services, information and support in your local area from our Kinship Compass.
Parental responsibility
Parental responsibility (sometimes called PR) is the rights, duties, powers, responsibilities and authority which a parent has in relation to a child and his or her property.
Whatever your circumstances as a kinship carer, it’s important to understand what decisions you can make and what rights the child’s parent has.
If you don’t have parental responsibility, it can make everyday decisions difficult depending on your relationship with the parents. You might struggle to come to agreements with the parents, or need regular contact to get their consent, such as for school trips.
Read more about obtaining parental responsibility for the child you are caring for.
Decision making
Parents still have parental responsibility. This means they are responsible for financial support and for making decisions about their child. They have a duty to notify the local authority that they are arranging for their child to live with a private foster carer.
They can delegate day-to-day decision making to you as a kinship carer. But they must consent to major decisions such as:
- medical treatment (except in an emergency where the hospital will make a decision on the best course of treatment)
- schooling
- foreign travel
- hair cuts
The Children’s Act 1989 says that even if you’re not a child’s parent or legal guardian, you can still make decisions to keep them safe. If you’re looking after a child, you’re allowed to do what makes sense and is reasonable to keep them safe and healthy.
To clarify which decisions you can make, you might find it helpful to draw up a document which you both sign. If you have trouble arranging this with the parents, you can ask children’s services for support.
Creating a decision-making document
If it is safe and feasible to do so, it can be helpful to write up an agreement between you and the parents that lists some of the decisions you might need to make, and who will be involved in making them. This can be an informal agreement, but if there are really important decisions expected you may want these included as part of a formal or legal agreement. If you or the child have a social worker, you can ask them for support with communicating with family members.
Your agreement might include:
- what rules you’ll agree to (such as bedtimes, when homework is done, staying out late)
- what you’ll do in emergencies
- how you’ll approach big decisions, such as choosing a secondary school
- how you’ll talk to children about the situation and what you tell them
- how you’ll communicate and resolve any disagreements
Benefits and financial help
There is no specific financial support for private foster carers. In most cases, the child’s parents must provide financial support, though we often find that they are unable or do not want to.
If the child’s parents are in work, you can ask them to provide support on an informal basis. If they refuse, you can ask the Child Maintenance Service (GOV.UK) to get involved, though you will usually have to pay a fee.
You may also be able to claim the same government benefits as other parents, including Child Benefit, Universal Credit and Pension Credit. You may also be eligible for support services from children’s services, which can include financial help.
Read more about financial support for private foster carers.
Support you can get
A social worker should visit the child you are privately fostering. They should also give you advice and support to help you care for the child.
Children who are privately fostered may also be assessed as children in need and provided with family services support by the local authority. You can ask your social worker for an assessment.
Support from Kinship
Here at Kinship, we offer a range of free support for all kinship carers, including workshops, online advice and information, and support groups.
To find services, information and support in your local area, including information about your local children’s services, use our Kinship Compass tool.
You can also contact the Kinship advice team for free, non-judgmental advice and information if you live in England or Wales.
Related advice on this topic
Information on financial support and benefits available for private foster carers to help pay for the cost of caring for a child.
Information on informal kinship care arrangements, including how you become an informal kinship carer and available support.
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