Kinship carer from London and volunteer Kinship peer support group leader

I have been a kinship carer for over 15 years to my nephew.

I decided to become a volunteer Kinship peer support group leader a year and a half ago because there was nothing in my local area for kinship families. I have previously been to support groups set up by local authorities and they had been dismissive of the challenges I faced. I wanted to make sure there was something in Kentish Town that would support kinship carers.

I am very active in my community and local church, so it was quite a natural fit for me to lead support group meetings for kinship carers. We come together in the church hall monthly and it’s a chance for us to just check in on each other. On a monthly basis, we just spend the time chatting about how we’re doing and identifying if anybody is going through any real challenges currently.

In my role I make sure that everybody knows what financial, educational and emotional support that is available. I often direct kinship carers to Kinship or other services that I know will help them directly. Kinship staff are always there to help if I don’t have the answers too.

I recently helped one lady who was struggling to get her granddaughter to go to school. Once I shared with her information about how to talk to talk school staff and request respite from her social worker, things began to improve. Her granddaughter now goes to another school and is thriving. She told me just yesterday that because her granddaughter is more settled, this has really helped her emotional wellbeing.

It makes me feel very proud to make such a difference to the lives of other kinship families. I went through it so I know the toll that the lack of support can have on your mental health. I try to move and walk as much as I can. This is something I encourage in the peer support group too. I want kinship carers to know that they can only look after their children if they look after themselves.

I’ve always been a proactive person, seeking information and wanting to make things better for my family. I don’t know where I get this energy from. But somehow, I do. Soon a solicitor will be visiting the group to share information about how to write a will and the group is over the moon to have this in-person support.

I don’t want anybody to go through the struggles that I did at the beginning on my kinship care journey. I don’t want to go back to that dark place. I volunteer because I want to give back to my community.

There’s no point doing it if you’re not passionate about kinship care. Once a month you just need to be able to show up with love, patience and kindness for a group of people who would be lost without you.